Crash Of Dreams
by Enjie
Summary: Tezuka discovers in Germany that he will no longer be able to play tennis because of an injury he thought he had overcome. Just how much of him is left if tennis is taken away from him?
1. Chapter 1

It had shattered.

Everything he had worked for, had recklessly pursued, pushed himself over the edge and sacrificed had all come down to this- he wouldn't be able to be reckless again, sacrifice and simply enjoy the thrill of tennis again. No, he couldn't play tennis again. All because of an injury he thought he had overcome, his only weakness became the deciding factor of his career and there was nothing he could about it. Everything that could be done had been done. Rehabilitation in Germany, three surgeries and countless sessions of physiotherapy for post-operation recovery but this time the doctor had told him that they have run out of options.

Tezuka turned the collar of his coat upwards until just his eyes were visible barely from underneath his spectacles. The cold wind was sweeping from underneath his coat and sweater and he hurried along the almost deserted streets of Berlin clutching the file the doctor had given him earlier with a firmer grip. The sight of his hotel loomed before him and he greatly welcomed the heat that was radiating from within. He stepped into the golden light and felt the black hole in his heart continue to grow and swallow him. Despair was closing in and panic had hit his nerves. He made it to his room on the fourteenth floor and clocked the door and stood with his back against the cool wood.

"_Ganbatte, buchou"_

"_Kunimitsu Tezuka, become the Seigaku's pillar of support"_

"_I will save you a ticket for the nationals. Be sure to come back to us"_

"_Our hopes are riding on you Tezuka"_

He shut his eyes tighter. He was shunning his duties as a captain. Seigaku was playing a match today in the Kantou Games. He quickly mailed Oishi a few simple words that carried the strength of Seigaku within them.

_Let's not get careless._

He flipped the phone shut and made way to sit on the edge of his bed. If he had known today would be the last day he would pick up a racquet, he would have played just more time. But that's what he didn't have-the chance. A few hours of just sitting there, he let the whole of the situation sink in, not thinking anything when his mind and heart were so badly troubled and agitated. The despair he had felt earlier was gradually sinking into a deeper part of his brain and he was able to have a more rational, coherent thinking process. Just how much of him was left if the ability to play tennis was taken away from him? He was about to find out now. He had been good at multiple things but it was tennis that motivated him to reach for that goal that you believed was impossible and then the exhilaration of attaining it. Just pushing him for that one more step, one more challenge and one more mountain for him to scale. All of that had been rudely snatched away from him, without proper warning and he was now expected to cope with it. He laughed at the irony, without any mirth, tears leaking down his cheeks in the dark room but no one would find out that Tezuka Kunimitsu was human too.

Tomorrow, he would walk around with his mask intact, stoic and ever the practical one. No one would find out that he was indeed just a seventeen year old who craved for warmth when he was vulnerable. And he was vulnerable without the tennis racquet in his hands. The phone beeped twice indicating a new message had been received.

He was surprised to see the sender's name.

From Echizen Ryoma

We won.

See you in Tokyo soon.

A second message followed from Oishi declaring they had won. But what surprised him was Fuji's message. And he hated to admit it but it scared him too.

Tezuka, I am here and home is here. Just one more challenge that you need to overcome and you will be on the top again. Ganbatte ne, Kunimitsu.

Just how did his boyfriend know what was going on in his life or was it a lucky guess? Was Fuji talking about something else entirely?

_I am coming Syusuke. You are there and home is there. It's just one more challenge I need to overcome. So what if my dream will take a little longer to realise? I know I will get there and we will be on the top again._ With that resolve in his mind, he wiped the first and the last of his tears and let the warmth from Fuji's message spread over him.

He was Tezuka Kunimitsu, captain of Seigaku's tennis team, student council president, and pillar of support, friend, boyfriend and human. He is Tezuka Kunimitsu and he is all of these things.

A/n: Wondering if to leave it as a one-shot or continue to develop this? Review please?


	2. Crash of Dreams 2

Crash of Dreams: Chapter 2

Kunimitsu wasn't sure how it all came to this. He is staring into the azure, starling blue of his boyfriend's eyes as they widened with surprise. Fear surged through him and he can't find the right words to say but thankfully, between the two of them, words were never required as Fuji wrapped him arms around the captain.

"I am here"

"Fuji I..."

"We'll get there Kunimitsu. I understand you are scared but we will get there" he said with finality in his voice

Ever since they began dating when they were fourteen, they had promised to never pretend in front of each other. It was difficult as they were so used to being in their masks that reality scared them but one by one, together, they had torn the walls down around each other.

"I don't know what to do without tennis"

"Maybe you are not without tennis. It is inside of you and it always will be there but we need to find another way to bring it out"

Dark amber eyes meet blue and understanding passes between them. They would not tell others until nationals are over. They couldn't tell them when they had reached nationals and for them to know that their trump card had failed could kill the morale of the team.

"Are you staying for dinner Fuji?" _I don't want to be alone tonight._

_We will talk about it later _"And what is for dinner?"

"Chilli soup with rice. My parents have gone out and will not be returning until tomorrow afternoon." _ We have the whole house to ourselves._

"Whose chilli?" _Do we?_

"Mine" _I promise._

"Ah, so mild then. I don't suppose you have wasabi sauce at home do you?" _I will hold you to it then._

"In the refrigerator" _Deal_.

Silently they sat in the kitchen, eating their dinner. They left the dishes in the wash basin for the maids to clean them and made their way to Tezuka's bedroom. It was considerably large, despite having been supposedly built for one but Tezuka and Fuji were comfortable with Fuji being so lithe.

Fuji rested his head against Tezuka's right shoulder and stroked the left one.

"Does it hurt?"

"Not when you touch it like that"

"What did the doctor say exactly?"

Tezuka thought back on the afternoon when he had gone to the doctor for a routine check-up when he had been experiencing some pain in his shoulder but in spite of it, he had played tennis with Hannah until the pain became unbearable.

_Kunimitsu, you will no longer be able to play tennis. The tendons in your left shoulder have snapped again._

_What about surgery?_

_I am sorry but surgery will not help either._

_What are my options?_

_You will have to quit tennis._

_What are options, doctor? Kunimitsu snapped_

_There are none._

Fuji did not know how to react or what to say. Tezuka was hurting and all he could do was be with him but he knew it wasn't enough, maybe for now, but in the days to come, it would not suffice.

"Fuji your message, how did you know?"

"I had an inclination, a feeling, a hunch but I wasn't sure what it was."

"Thank-you Fuji."

"Saa, it's been three years and you still won't call me by my given name."

"I am sorry...Syusuke"

"What are you going to do now?"

"I honestly have no idea but we can't tell the team, not now"

"They have a right to know. They have fought alongside you up till now and they will continue to. They deserve to know."

Tezuka remained silent. His team, he took so much pride in them as their captain and was truly honoured to play alongside them but he wasn't sure if it would be the best thing to tell them right now.

"Think about it Kunimitsu. There is no need to hurry. No matter what your decision is, I am sure they will understand."

"Hn." Tezuka replied neutrally.

"I have a plane to catch tomorrow morning to Tokyo. I'll let them know that you are doing well in Berlin."

"Good night" Tezuka brushed his lips lightly against the smaller boy's forehead, his ear and cheek. In turn he received a swift peck on the lips.

"We can work something about."

"Yeah...maybe"

"Good night. Mornings are the best times to think so don't trouble yourself tonight."

"Aa."


End file.
